# Web Humor: Silly or Scary

The following, emailed to me by a friend who is not usually prone to disseminating such things, is either really silly or very scary. Perhaps both.

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How can we achieve 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

On the other hand,
B-U-L-L-\$-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that, while Hardwork and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it’s the BULL\$HIT and ASSKISSING that will put you over the top !!!

D-E-V-R-A, alone, only gets you 50%, but D-E-V-R-A-D-O-W-R-I-T-E gives you 144% of your minimum daily requirement. (Of course T-E-R-R-Y-T-E-A-C-H-O-U-T scores even higher — 179% — so what else is new? Cheers TT, here’s to you — may you remain in the stunned but happy state of grace to which I will continue to aspire.)